About love and cuckolding

Personally, I think that the purest and most long lived cuckold relationship is one where the couple have attained the three levels of love between them. That the wife's sexuality with other men is an extension of her sexuality with her cuck. That she uses her studs as surrogates for her cuck. The expressions that she uses, the things that she will do with her lovers that she would never do with her cuck are done to enhance his emotional release when he's finally allowed to let go.

Like what has been said before, erotic lovemaking is easy to do. I love the cocks that go into me. All they need to be is clean, large, thick, last forever and cum a lot and frequently. From the cuck's perspective, watching his wife be well fucked and then licking the lover's cum from her fulfills his physical lovemaking role.

But that's a pretty empty love life. One that's easily disrupted by a unique stud. It makes it easy for the wife to be distracted if all she has is erotic love. She needs more. They as a couple need more in order to survive as a couple with all this sex between one partner and outside others.

My husband is not only my cuck and sub, he's also my best friend. I trust him and respect him. he's a businessman in a tough industry. he makes solid business decisions that protect what he's built, and has maintained the jobs of those that depends upon him. he invests in them in terms of training and skills development, and providing seed money if they elect to go independent. he is also supportive of me in my business ventures, too. he raises my girls as if they're his own (they're not his). he also wants what's best for me. he's there when my bfs leave me; telling me that he wasn't worthy of me and encouraging me to look for another lover. he takes my whipping him when my lovers or some other male piss me off.

There's also the most difficult of all types of love here. Unconditional love. No matter that I spurn him and his seed as unworthy in impregnating me, he expresses his love to me and my children. he knows that they're not his girls, yet he loves them as though they were. his love for me is boundless. That I tell him to get my lover hard so that he can fuck me good brings him pleasure not through the act of sucking my lover's cock, but because doing it will make me happy when that cock is plunging into me. 

he asked me to marry him, and I accepted, and then told him that I had a date later that night. That we'll celebrate that night when I came home by letting him lick me clean. he was smiling knowing that I would always come home to him. Without him to come home to, my life would be pretty empty. I would simply be a slut.

I may have mentioned it here or somewhere else, but chrissy and I saw a movie "Of Gods and Men" a few months ago. It's about a group of monks in a remote village deep in Islamic territory. They had a symbiotic relationship with the town. The town provided labor for the order to help with selling and collecting honey, vegtables, etc. The monks provided jobs and healthcare for the town.

After a threat to the order was made by some fundamentalists, the monks were considering leaving. The town elders met with them and pleaded them to stay. One woman likened the monks and towns relationship as a bird and a branch. The bird flitters about gathering food, twigs, finding mates and doing all kinds of things, while the monks were the branches that were always there, always steady. She said, without the branch, the birds have no place to stand.

I am a bird. chrissy is my branch.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I want to post a few things for which I am thankful for this year.  It has been quite eventful one for me.  I have had my baby girl Diana this year.  I found my slave cheryl as well.  Last and certainly not least the founding of my company.

My homage to the people for whom my life would be meaningless.

First, I'm thankful for chrissy who has enabled me to become a fully realized woman. I still love to see your expression when I tell you that I'm going to stay out overnight with another man. I appreciate the care you take with my body in preparation for me to give it over to another man. I love the feel of your tongue when I come home filled with His love while I tell you how it all got there. I hope to have this fun for many decades to come. But I also deeply appreciate the friendship we have, how we have weathered financial troubles together, how we have raised my daughters and the love you have for them even though they're not yours. Your laugh is contagious, your wit is as sharp and ready as ever, and your intellect is wondrous as always. The gods blessed me when they showed you to me!

To my girls Becky, Jenny and Diana. The depths of my love and admiration of them deepens with each passing year, month, and moment. I see the wonderment of learning new things in their faces each day. I see their love for each other, for daddy, for cheryl, and for me grow stronger. I see their personalities uniquely develop as they experience the world through the lenses of their own interactions with it, and I'll say that the world will know and respect them.

To my cheryl who has embraced my family as if her own. Though we've only known her this year, it seems as though she has always been with us. Her patience with my uppity clients is a marvel. The way she explains to Becky and Jenny why she loves and worships me in a way that they understand. Watching her hold Diana to her breast and her obvious love for her as tears run from her eyes. Her constant smile and her quick and cute school girl giggle. The way she takes the flogger and crop, the excitement of her obeying me when I tell her to strip or to go under the table. The way she holds me at night, or the way she curls up in her cage with a smile on her face and almost purring in contentment.

For my brilliant employees who make me look real good. Together we'll be the fastest growing consulting firm in this area at least if not the East. The big boys will sit up and take notice of us, and our work will really pay off then.

Finally, to you my friends. It's a joy to share some of my life with you all. Despite the slings and arrows you have stood by me and proven your mettle and for that I am extremely grateful.

Thank you all, and have a safe and happy Thanksgiving festival!!

Love,
Amy
xoxo

The BabyCenter.Com and Swimming with Sharks

Several months ago, I was pregnant with my girl Diana.  While I was rummaging the Internet, I ran across a website called BabyCenter.com.  I thought I’d take a look at it as it had been a number of years since I had a baby – seven to be exact.  Maybe they learned something about birthing and raising children that had never been known of in the 2.5 Million years of human existence.  Who knows?  Maybe they found a new way to breast feed? 

As I searched through the site, I found the groups.  Birth groups mostly, but as I looked at people’s profiles, I realized that there were other types of groups out there, too.  So I signed up for them.  Groups with names like “Confessions of a Naughty Mom”, or “Momma’s in Alternate Lifestyles”.  So I signed up for some of them.  I know a thing or two about sex.  I’m always willing to learn new things, and, in exchange, teach a few things too.

My first foray as Amy32Mom was going great until I ran into some little bitties who didn’t agree with my lifestyle, so they attacked me by sending nasty emails.  Very unchristian-like for religious types.  So I backed off of BBC for  a few months.  I had my little one to keep me busy anyway.  Not to mention 2 other daughters, a business, a husband and a slave.  Keeps me busy.

I found, though, that I missed talking to the ladies there.  So I re-established myself, this time as Amy_Pond, and began getting back involved.  All the usual ladies were there.  They were having some wild times and happily writing about it in the groups.  Well, it was wild to them, not so much to me, but when you were raised vanilla, lived your live vanilla, lost your virginity to your high school sweetheart whom you then married and have 2.3 kids with, kissing another woman is out there!  And I’m really happy they did kiss that woman.

Long story short, I started to relate some of the things that I’ve done with women, men, my cucky chrissy, and probably entirely too many other things.  I also enjoyed the exposure thoroughly.  The ladies saw the proverbial bad girl in me, and while they may not have wanted to be me, they wanted to do some of the things that they saw me doing.  They expressed a desire to do some things, but they were afraid to try.  I told them that the basis upon which any relationship is build, specially a Domme/sub one, is trust.  Does the sub trust the Domme to subject themselves to her pain without permanently harming, be that pain physical or emotional.

A remarkable thing happened.  Some of them began to explore with their husbands.  And their husbands ate it up!  This woman who is the mother of my children is a sexual person!  Some ladies said that they thought that they were doomed to once a month sex if that.  Their desire, or their husband’s desire, had dried up and gone away.  The scary thing is they’re in their 20’s.  That’s not right!

Some tried bits and pieces of what I talked about.  Some became assertive with their husbands.  Some became submissive.  They talked to their husbands and found out that they had fantasies, too.  That some of them were similar or the same as theirs.  And so they began the process of exploration.

The problem was that I went too far.  The BabyCenter.com, which is managed by little old ladies in knee length wool dresses, heavily girdled with petticoats and who knows what all else, who have never seen their husband’s cock and only fucked the one time; their virginal wedding night and beget their only child that one time they did it, finally had it with me.  So they literally purged me.  Everything related to me.  All the posts I made, comments I made, gone.  It was like the Soviet or Chinese purges you read about in history books.  One moment Vladimir was sitting there in his cubicle, then he went to the bathroom and was never heard from again.  It’s weird when it happens to you.

I came back again, this time as Hello_Sweetie.  I found out that not only was I purged, but they were closing one of the groups that I belonged to called “Confessions of a Naughty Mom.”  So what would you suppose would be posted in a group named that?  How to keep your baby’s butt dry?  ‘Yes, I confess I use talcum powder to keep little junior's butt dry.’  Yeah, that would be riveting!

No, they were talking sex *GASP!*  Women talking SEX!?!?  It was a public forum, to boot!  Anyone could join in and often did.  The discussions were lively and fun.  Then the word came that they were closing the group down.  No reason given as to why they were taking this action, other than it was "too adult."  I guess that means women not acting like Puritans.  Well, quiet women never make history. 

What follows is my last post on BBC, which is what everyone there calls BabyCenter.  To me, and any swinger or cuckoldress, that's shorthand for a Big Black Cock.  Anyway, here's my last post on BabyCenter.  I think it's worth preserving.

----------------

Swimming With Sharks

I want to take a moment to precisely say why I'm upset with the closing of Confessions. I am not upset one wit about what I wrote, because I believe that I put maybe a few toes over the edge in some, maybe a lot, in my postings. No, I'm not upset with what I wrote at all.

I'm supremely upset that because of what I wrote, Confessions will be silenced. Because of what I wrote, some couples will not try to rekindle what they had because they're afraid of what their spouse will think of them.

I've said numerous times that I'm an attention whore. I love the notoriety, I'll plainly admit to that. There's more to it than that, though. It's also showing (or trying to show) that it's OK to be maybe a little out there. The water's just fine, thank you very much. And you don't become anything less than what we all are - mothers, wives, lovers.

It's like what happened with me a few years ago when I went with a lover to the Caribbean on holiday.

He was a professional diver, so I went to class to earn my diving certificate. After I was certified, we went "swimming with the sharks" for which you pay good money to tempt huge sharks with hundreds of razor sharp teeth to eat you, and I mean that in a very non-sexual way.

To attract the sharks, the operators "chum" the water with a disgusting mix of chopped up fish. No single hunk much more than a few inches long.

Professional diver that he is, he dons his wetsuit, puts on his tank and goggles and back flips over the side, right next to the chum slick.

These sharks were HUGE! Primal beasts that think of only two things, procreation and feeding, and more feeding than procreating. The operators also had hunks of meat that they would put over the stern of the boat, and the sharks made the water boil in a frenzy trying to get at and eat the hunks of meat. And my lover is in the water with them!!! I have GOT to pick better lovers!

Fortunately for chicken swimmers like me, the operators have a shark cage, so I can get in the water and still be protected. So I get in.

I thought the sharks were huge when I was on the boat. No. These things weren't huge. They were FREAKIN' GINORMOUS!!! With A MILLION serrated razor sharp teeth in both of their jaws strong enough to crush you. The thrashing that they do in the water, ripping hunks of meat off of the bait was almost effortless. Yet there is my lover with a fish in his hand FEEDING THEM!!! BY HAND!!!

Definitely have to rethink him! The sharks would swim around the cage, bumping into it and looking like they wanted to, and would have if given the chance, get inside an be with us. I was practically wetting myself! What the FUCK was I thinking when I agreed to this!!!

After a few moments though (about a half tank of air because I was hyperventilating) I calmed down when I realized that the sharks couldn't get in. I also saw my lover feed the sharks. I saw how graceful the sharks swam and how effortless it was for them to cruise along in the water until there was an opportunity. Then with a powerful swipe of the tail, they disappeared.

Every once in awhile, my bf would have to push a too curious shark away with his hand on the sharks snout, mere inches from those deadly teeth. My gods it was exciting to watch how calmly he handled them!

When we were back on board I wanted so badly to rape him it wasn't even funny! It was one of the most exciting things I've done. I felt so alive then. Every fibre of my being was tingling. I could feel every micron of my skin where it touched the wetsuit. I had been in the water with SHARKS!

Would I do that again? Oh hell yes!!! To feel the excitement again would be a true thrill. But I also know that the next time, I'd want to be outside of the safety of the cage and really be WITH the sharks preferably with one of those chain mail suits one of the other guests had on, but still... To feel the adrenaline and the natural high I experienced from before? Oh, yum!!!

Because of BBC's archaic stance in their treatment of all of us women, and trying to accommodate the lowest of the common denominators (ie the prudes of the board), I cannot be my lover in the shark story above. Worst of all, you, all of you, cannot be me in the shark cage. And some of you cannot be the guests in the chain mail suit. You won't see the possibilities of various lifestyles. You may not be able to ask questions of a "professional diver" in the seas of BDSM. You may not feel emboldened as I am to swim outside of your comfortable cage. To swim free with the sharks, even if only for a moment. To try a new position. To try to Top your husband. To try...

And THAT is why I'm profoundly sorry to lose Confessions. THAT is why I'm sorry to see edgy posts get deleted. THAT is why I really dislike BBC's policy of not allowing adults to be - adults.

Slave cheryl under the table

Last week was a great week for my young company.  There were 5 large contracts I was going out for, and I was awarded 3 of them.  The other 2 are still up in the air and may fall my way, also.  It was time to celebrate!

chrissy brought the baby sitter, I packed up the family, and we went out for a celebratory dinner and a movie.  I had been feeling particularly negligent towards my girls as I was working pretty long hours getting everything together for the proposals, and then in discussing and negotiating the final awards with the companies.  These things take time and a lot of effort.  It's a real slog.  That's a lot of time away from the girls, and effort focused away from them.

So we went to see Dolphin Tale.  It was a fun flick for the girls, though a bit beneath them.  They still enjoyed it.  The girls liked it because it was about a dolphin, and they're cute, and it had a boy and girl about their age as primary characters.  It was a good flick for them.  After the movie, we went to an upscale family restaurant, and generally had a great night out as a family. 

When we got back home it was 10pm and time for the girls to get to bed.  cheryl, chrissy and I went around saying good night to them.  I spent a bit of time with them just cuddling with them and talking about stuff.  It didn't take too long for them to fall asleep.

Though it was mid-week, chrissy suggested that I take cheryl out to thank her for her efforts on winning the contracts, and he would stay with the baby and girls.  It was a good idea, so we took him up on it, got dressed up to go dancing and left.  cheryl wore a little black dress with a deep neckline that showed off her breasts nicely.  she also wore stockings a garter and heels.  I was in a textile mood so I also wore a little colorful red silk sheath dress, stockings and a garter with a high heeled strappy sandal.

Reggie the bouncer let us through quickly.  It's good to know the people that guard the doors. 

As the doors opened, the heavy bass and drums thumping the beat of the industrial music could be felt in our chests.  The DJ had the place jumping as we got there.  We went in past Tony collecting cover charges.  cheryl and I kissed his cheek and walked in.  He did get a feel of cheryl's ass as she yelped and then giggled like a little girl and proceeded to kick her butt into overdrive for him as she walked away.  I lifted her skirt and smacked her ass hard.  I looked back at Tony and winked at him.  He was laughing at our antics, and no doubt savoring the sight of her bare butt, stockings and the garter strap he saw.

Weeknights aren't overly busy at a dance club like this, but there were a few of the usual suspects.  Our antics also drew the attention of most of the people in our immediate area.

We found a booth and sat next to each other.  We each ordered a non-alcoholic drink (we are nursing after all).  We had to fend off a few men who came to ask us to dance with them.  I told them a little later, that we wanted our drink and to talk a little first. 

I told cheryl to put her hands in her lap and kiss me.  she immediately did as instructed, but she wasn't ready for the intensity of the kiss I gave her.  I could feel her hands twitching wanting to pull me into her, but she did as instructed.  As our tongues reached out to caress the other's lips and tongue, I slid a hand up from her tummy to her ample breasts.  They really are lovely, warm, soft and smooth skinned with a nice pointy nipple just begging to be played with.  So I did for a little.

As we were kissing, our drinks came.  I could tell without acknowledging her that the waitress' mouth was wide open as my hand was clearly inside her dress.  Just to prove it to her, I pushed the dress material so the waitress could see cheryl's lovely breast.  I said, while looking into cheryl's eyes, "isn't it a lovely breast?"  I finally looked at the waitress and paid her for the drinks and left her a nice tip and a :thank you."

All the while, cheryl's breast was exposed.  I had told her to leave her hands in her lap, after all.  she is very obedient.  I fixed her dress for her.  I asked her if she enjoyed that, she told me that she had, that her panties would be ruined before the night was out if I kept that up with her.  I told her I have every intention to make her ruin them.  "Lets dance."

We went out on the dance floor and were pretty quickly surrounded by people.  Mostly men, but a few single women, too. 

We danced a few together and with the men and women.  I toyed with the idea of inviting some of the women back to our table, but I was thinking of something a little more traditional for us tonight.  At least on that front.  Two men and two women it was.  I invited two men back to the table with us to chat.  I also told them that was all we would do with them.  I told them in essence that we come here frequently, so I may select them another time.  That should keep them on good behavior - the possibility of future fun.  The actual probability would be quite low.

As we sat, there was a man between cheryl and myself on either side of us.  cheryl sipped her drink as did I and we all chatted.  I mentioned that cheryl is my slave and will do anything that I tell her to do, but that doesn't mean that they can touch her without my permission.  They were amazed at that and couldn't believe what I was telling them.

I motioned to cheryl to come to me.  she started to get up to walk around, and I shook my head, "no."  I motioned for her to go under the table to me.  she got a wicked grin on her face, surreptitiously glanced around and started to slip under the table.  I'll have to rebuke her for that little insecurity on her part.  While she did that, I put one let up on each of the men's laps and leaned back in the booth's seat.

The men held my legs as cheryl kissed and licked her way from my toes upwards.  her care and attention to my erogenous zones, the way she licked between my toes and my ankles.  her head between their knees while she licked my calves.  she licked behind my knees and started again moving closer to my center.  she licked my thighs between the men's fingers and started again moving closer.  I'm sure she could smell me and was getting excited herself. 

She started to run her hands up my legs lightly and slowly up to my panties when I shook my head again.  I said a single word; "teeth."  she used her mouth, teeth and tongue to move my panties to the side.

Just as she managed to get them to the side, the waitress came back and the boys bought us another round.  I looked down at cheryl and asked her if she wanted another drink.  she started to pull back and I said no.  Nod or shake your head for yes or no.

While she was licking me, she nodded her head, yes.  hmmmm that felt sooo good!  "Do you want wine, darling?" I asked.  she shook her head no, her face well between the folds of my lips.  "Do you want a beer?", and another shake of the head, all the while licking my soaking pussy.  she's really good at this and a true distraction.

By this time the waitress was wondering who I was talking to and came over to see.  She could barely see her face between my pussy lips when I asked her if she wanted water.  she nodded, and it almost set me off as she exaggerated her nodding to go from my pussy to my clit and back down.  The cranberry and soda water drink hon?  she nodded pretty vigorously and I started to cum a little. "Lick my cunt, little slut.  Lick all my juices and I'll let you have your drink."  I pulled her face into my folds and had a nice cum.  My audience of the two men and the waitress were open mouthed statutes staring at what was going on in front of them.  The waitress finally left to put in our order. 

cheryl stopped licking after that and put her cheek on my upper thigh putting little butterfly kisses on my lips.  Every once in awhile a lick.  she had wrapped her arms under my thighs and was hugging my pubic area to her face.   

When the waitress returned with our drinks and the boy's beers, cheryl thanked her for the drink.  As the waitress looked down at cheryl with her head resting on my bare thigh, cheryl licked my pussy one last time.  she fixed my panties and dress, and arose from below in her seat.

A while later as we left the club, I took a twenty and folded it.  I found our waitress and put the bill down the front of her blouse and tucked it between her breast and her brassier.  I kissed her cheek and thanked her for letting us play at her table.  She husked back, "any time!"

Early life with my cuckie

I promised that I'd write about him.  So here we go!  :)

I think that my dh, chrissy, loves to watch or at least hear another man do me.  We've been doing it for almost 14 years, 12 married.

For many, the term is wife sharing.  That's where the man lets his wife have other men usually with him present.  The husb then will have sex with the wife to "reconnect" with her.  This may also culminate the sexual evening with the husband licking the cum from both the lover and himself .  I don't perceive this to be a bisexual act at all.  I think the "worst" you could call it is a submissive act, but I don't think it's that bad at all.  This is common in the swinging lifestyle, I'm told.

As you can probably tell from what I call my husband, chrissy is a feminized version of Chris.  I use it in a derogatory and diminutive way as part of our lifestyle which is more intense than the wife sharing I talked about above.  chrissy is a cuckold.  I totally control his sexuality.  I control when he can jerk off.  I control the type of sex he can have.  I am a Female Dominant, or Domme.  I, on the other hand, am free to go out and have sex with whomever I wish and when ever I desire.  I always come home to my cuckie, and usually with a nice creamy pussy for him to clean up, though sometimes its my ass that needs his oral attentions.

chrissy is small cocked, thin and quick to cum.  At the time I met him in college, I was just coming out of a near Master/slave relationship where I was the slave.  However, that was mostly in name only.  My Master told me when he took me on that I would be a short term sub soon to be Domme.  I didn't believe him, but here I am a Domme.  I have done a lot of things sexually in my life, some of which were quite distasteful to me.  In any event, I was a highly sexual woman.  I need a lot of good sex  A 4"-ish thin cocklete isn't going to do it for me.  That's what chrissy has.  When he showed that to me, I almost walked away from him.  As I said before here, that would have been a big mistake.

He asked, almost begged me, to stay with him.  Not to leave because of his diminutive equipment.  He also said that he'd understand if I went out with other men to quell my thirst, just please come home to him.  Over the next few weeks, I did just that.  I would go out almost every night with another man.  I'd come back to his apartment where he'd lick their sperm from me, spend a few moments in me and then lick his out, too. 

I thought to myself that I could do this.  he's a wonderful man; caring, funny, intelligent, creative, loved the same music and art as I do.  If only he had a real cock he'd be perfect.  Could I find another man that had the same qualities as chrissy has, only with a sexual capability that my lovers had?  When I looked at those men I realized that the only thing they had to offer me was between their legs.  That's nice and all, but every male has that.  I was falling IN LOVE with chrissy very hard.  I'd never be able to do that with the other men.  There was nothing there for me other than their cocks. 

chrissy also had another thing that they didn't have; a magnificent, awesome tongue!  Oh, my!  Can that man lick!!!

One night in January chrissy and I were sitting in his apartment studying and listening to music.  He was idly playing with my breast while I reclined on him.  he asked me if he could take me out to dinner on Friday night.  I told him that I had a date that night.  he told me that would be OK that he'd have an early dinner so we'd be done by 9.  It's a date.

Friday he asked me to marry him.  He asked me to marry him knowing that I was going to go out on a date with another man that night.  I told him that I would have to continue dating, and he said that he understood, it's just that he couldn't envision a world without me in it with him.  Awww!  How sweet is that!?!?  Of course, I said yes, and he slipped a ring on my finger.

We ended up leaving the restaurant and going back to his place.  It was 8 then, so I let him cum in me, and then proceeded to get ready for my date.  I looked at my ring and then looked at him.  I smiled and gave him a kiss and told him that I loved him.  I told him that I will always keep his rings on.

he helped me get ready.  he wanted me to look good to show that HE had the prettiest and sexiest girl on campus, and that he was proud that I was his and would always come home to him.  I always have and always will.  I left for my date wearing my new ring...

How I came to own cheryl

cheryl is a rescue girl. she was battered by her ex-husb for failing in her female role of providing him with children. she was accused of taking birth control pills (bcps) under strict orders for her not to.

she didn't. It's that she's infertile.

So the idiot would beat her for disobeying him. No matter how many tests, she always "fixed" it with the doctors so that it'd come back that she's infertile when he "really knew the score" that she was sneaking bcps.

she was lost for 6 months after his arrest. she got a job as an office manager (her first job) and loved it. she was invited to a party and was really anxious NOT to go, but was talked into it by the hostess. I happened to also know the hostess and was invited to the same party.  I really wasn't wild about going, but boy am I ever glad I did!

Both chrissy and I went, dressed as we would for any vanilla activity. I did wear a leather skirt and the calf-length boots with steel heels and some fun things underneath it all. chrissy was looking dapper in his sport coat, gray slacks and silk shirt.

cheryl noticed that chrissy was always at my beckoning. It's very subtle, but she noticed it while others didn't or wrote it off to an attentive husband.

she meekly introduced herself to me and we proceeded to talk for the next 2 hours. she even took up chrissy's role and fetched for both of us. chrissy was funny and said he could get used to this. I told him not to and smiled at him. I then told him that I still needed him, and he shuddered a little.

We left the party at an appropriate time. I promised that I'd take cheryl home. We went to a quiet bar I know and talked for another few hours until last call.

We all dated her; me, chrissy, the girls and all of us as a family for another month before as a family we asked her to join us. I had taken her to my doctor (OB/GYN) to evaluate her issues and to ask a special research project for him. His response and analysis proved helpful.

she still couldn't have children of her own, but I was 2 months preg at the time. The doc said that there's a possibility that a hormone regimen could enable her to nurse. It wasn't a guarantee, but a possibility. About 50/50. I told her I couldn't help get her pregnant, but I would like her to try it and see if she could help me nurse my baby with me. It's the closest I could get her to being a mother.

I was attacked by a 130 lb blond 38 yo sobbing woman profusely thanking me and telling me basically that I'm her goddess just for thinking of this.

The therapy regimen was successful. her milk shows normal hormonal balances for a regular nursing mother and she's joyously nursing Diana with me.

The results have been staggering to me. Well beyond my wildest expectations. Light years beyond them.

It's my anniversary. 12 lovely years.

Under Editing..

Thoughts on Love and Cuckoldry

Personally, I think that the purest and most long lived cuckold relationship is one where the couple have attained the three levels of love between them. That the wife's sexuality with other men is an extension of her sexuality with her cuck. That she uses her studs as surrogates for her cuck. The expressions that she uses, the things that she will do with her lovers that she would never do with her cuck are done to enhance his emotional release when he's finally allowed to let go.

Like what has been said before, erotic lovemaking is easy to do. I love the cocks that go into me. All they need to be is clean, large, thick, last forever and cum a lot and frequently. From the cuck's perspective, watching his wife be well fucked and then licking the lover's cum from her fulfills his physical lovemaking role.
But that's a pretty empty love life. One that's easily disrupted by a unique stud. It makes it easy for the wife to be distracted if all she has is erotic love. She needs more. They as a couple need more in order to survive as a couple with all this sex between one partner and outside others.

My husband is not only my cuck and sub, he's also my best friend. I trust him and respect him. he's a businessman in a tough industry. he makes solid business decisions that protect what he's built, and has maintained the jobs of those that depends upon him. he invests in them in terms of training and skills development, and providing seed money if they elect to go independent. he is also supportive of me in my business ventures, too. he raises my girls as if they're his own (they're not his). he also wants what's best for me. he's there when my bfs leave me; telling me that he wasn't worthy of me and encouraging me to look for another lover. he takes my whipping him when my lovers or some other male piss me off.

There's also the most difficult of all types of love here. Unconditional love. No matter that I spurn him and his seed as unworthy in impregnating me, he expresses his love to me and my children. he knows that they're not his girls, yet he loves them as though they were. his love for me is boundless. That I tell him to get my lover hard so that he can fuck me good brings him pleasure not through the act of sucking my lover's cock, but because doing it will make me happy when that cock is plunging into me. he asked me to marry him, and I accepted, and then told him that I had a date later that night. That we'll celebrate that night when I came home by letting him lick me clean. he was smiling knowing that I would always come home to him. Without him to come home to, my life would be pretty empty. I would simply be a slut.

I may have mentioned it here or somewhere else, but chrissy and I saw a movie "Of Gods and Men" a few months ago. It's about a group of monks in a remote village deep in Islamic territory. They had a symbiotic relationship with the town. The town provided labor for the order to help with selling and collecting honey, vegtables, etc. The monks provided jobs and healthcare for the town.

After a threat to the order was made by some fundamentalists, the monks were considering leaving. The town elders met with them and pleaded them to stay. One woman likened the monks and towns relationship as a bird and a branch. The bird flitters about gathering food, twigs, finding mates and doing all kinds of things, while the monks were the branches that were always there, always steady. She said, without the branch, the birds have no place to stand.

I am a bird. chrissy is my branch.

About me

Welcome to my little corner of the world.

I'm going to use this space occasionally to present my thoughts on my life as it's gone so far, and where I think it might be headed.  Some will be cerebral discussions.  Some will be rather earthy.   I will welcome considered comments gladly.  Hate notes just don't fit in this discussion.

I'm a married bisexual woman.  chrissy and I have been married 11 years almost 12, and he's all mine.  he is fully cuckolded and knew going into our marriage that his life would be this way.  At some point, I'll tell you the story about when he asked me to marry him.

I also own a fem sub.  she lives with us 24/7, and is in her sub-space 24/7.  cheryl is a very special woman; 38, divorced from an abusive husband.  His abuse of her was because he wanted a family and she couldn't give him one.  she's infertile.  He swore that she was taking bcp's.  He really did a number on her, but she's safe now and secure.

Finally there are my three daughters, Becky 11, Jenny 8 and our latest addition, Diana 6 weeks. .

Over time I'll discuss the family dynamics and how all the relationships work.  So sit back, kick up and enjoy my journey!